Thursday, November 1, 2012

Last Call Logline #10

Previous Post #51

TITLE: CALIFORNIA R.I.P.
GENRE: YA Contemporary

When her parents’ divorce uproots Huntington Beach native Dani to Sun Valley, Idaho, she isn’t stoked to trade in her surfboard for skis. But when a cute shredder named Cash gets her hooked on snowboarding, Dani must decide if she wants the future at USC she’d planned, or if her heart has found an unlikely home in the mountains, after all.

6 comments:

  1. I think this looks solid. But based on the logline, I'm thinking it's YA Romance instead of YA Contemporary. (Though I am admittedly no expert on either one). The logline, in any case, reads like straight romance...

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  2. I really like the title.

    I also like the use of surfer/boarder language in the logline - it sets the tone for the novel.

    Good job and good luck in BD!

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  3. This looks fantastic! I can't find anything to critique. Good luck!

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  4. I like it; it reads well. I wonder, though, if there's anything you could add to amp up the stakes, or point out unique twists. I guess to me it's sounding a little "quiet." Giving up a plan to go to a certain college doesn't seem like that big of a deal. Just my 2 cents of course, and I could be completely wrong. As it is, I think it sounds good. I just wonder if there's a way to push it over the top if you know what I mean?
    Fight on!

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  5. I love the way this reads! My only complaint would be the "after all". I don't feel it's needed.

    Great job and good luck! :)

    #12

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  6. Thanks all for the comments and helpful advice!
    good luck to all of you, too :)

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